Speech Samples

We thought it was important to provide some samples from “The Entertaining Groom” and
“The Funny Best Man”. This is a small sample, and there is much more contained in our books.

The Funny Best Man

Hello, ladies and gentlemen and distinguished guests. I use the words “distinguished guests” now as I probably won't be able to distinguish any of you later on tonight.

I am a little nervous about making this speech. The last time I had to speak in public was at Alcoholics Anonymous. But I have to say, it’s nice to see so many familiar faces here today.

Every now and again, we get the opportunity to talk about a man of the highest integrity and honor. A man of achievement and action, who is obviously destined for great things. Unfortunately, ladies and gentlemen, that is not going to happen today.

I really do believe that marriage will be a wonderful thing for [GROOM´S NAME]. It will teach him loyalty, self-restraint and control. And it will help him develop a sense of responsibility, fair play and so many other qualities he wouldn't need if he just stayed single.

The Entertaining Groom

Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I have been told that this is usually one of the only times in a married man’s life when he can be in the company of his wife and mother in-law and not be interrupted. I may be here sometime.

I have to admit that I’m very nervous about making this speech. In fact, it reminds me of a story about the famous British admiral, Lord Nelson. He was asked why he always put on a red tunic before a battle. He said it was so the enemy wouldn’t see the blood if he got injured. So, ladies and gentlemen, this explains why I am wearing brown underpants tonight.

I would like to thank mum and dad for their support over the years and for making me into the sex god you all see today.

Thanks to bridesmaids for getting [BRIDE’S NAME] to the church on time, which is a trick you need to give me the secret to sometime.


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